My Mind 19/11

I look to the sky,
cast grey like tarmac,
I try and trace a path,
hoping it leads to you,
but it breaks to soon,
falling to the ground with fury.

I look to the ground,
now broken by puddles,
I gaze at them,
finding only broken bits of me,
that was once whole.

My love for you

My love for you,

is not a pretty garden,
with flowers and kept bushes,
for all to admire,
and many nimble hands to sustain.

It is a forest,
wild, twisted, dark, ferocious,
rooted and strong,
it stands despite time and nature,
it is where visceral thoughts of you,

roam free,
it exists for us alone,
forbidding to everyone else.

a passing thought...

gloom veils our faces,
thick festering mass,
creeping over all thats us,
making today about,
yesterday's horror,
tomorrow's sorrow.

slithers and constricts,
like a vine,
over its unfortunate host,
till it is everything
the world sees,
and the underneath is left for dead.

as we stare it in the face,
our fingers entwine,
and i whisper,
"stay strong, brave face,
the cloud of despair,
shall pass in time.",

and together we shall exclaim,
'ha, it too has finally passed'
drawing you closer for an embrace,
a voice inside me asks,
"what if you are a cloud shading me,
from the bleak out there that is me?"

far end of the world

by the far end of the world i stand,
where sky melts into earth,
intertwining intangibly,
the great abyss,
stares back,
at an emptier shell.

and by the far end of the world i stand,
a paper boat in hand,
to ferry the best of me,
i found in you,
when i looked for me
in you.

and by the far end of the world i stand,
wrapping the best part of me,
in morning mist,
flicked from a better day,
that saw you,
thus was you.

and by the far end of the world i stand,
giving this vessel sight,
with a jar of noble light,
an illuminated jar of glass,
that holds in it,
the moon's reflection,
that fell on you.

and by the far end of the world i stand,
releasing the breath,
i drew from you,
gently on the boat,
till it fills it paper sail,
carrying it gently forth.

by the far end of the world i stand,
the demons of the world behind,
mocking in ferocious sincerity,
watching the paper boat,
slip away from their grip.
they screech, preach and pray,
for they know, even if they get me,
the ark is safe,
even if it be destroyed,
it shall never be taint.
and in this I lie content,
by the far end of the world.

anything but itself

slow determination,
chaotic bends,
like determined vines,
flows love's rot,
reaching nowhere,
reaching everwhere,
until the surface,
is anything but itself.

for a mad world, one needs you

wanna hug you,
as the world rolls by,
and rips its self bare,
while I remain safe,
in your embrace.

the ends of the world,
rise up against each other,
madness floods planet,
while I remain safe,
in your embrace.

the world breaks its bones,
and throws its insides out,
on display for all to see,
while I remain safe,
in your embrace.

the world is set ablaze,
its light more terrifying,
than any darkness,
while I remain safe,
in your embrace.

but the perversion,
reaches us it finds,
an incorrigible halo,
while we remain safe,
in our embrace.

let us hug,
as the world rolls by,
and rips its self bare,
while we remain safe,
in our embrace.

around the world seven times

i went around the world seven times,
remotest corners,
highest mountains,
lowest depths,
widest plains,
in search of you,

once as a king,
to charm you love,
but u where not to be found,

once as a scholar,
to reason with you love,
but u where not to be found,

once as a magician,
to mystify you,
but u where not to be found,

once as a clown,
to tickle you,
but u where not to be found,

once as a thief,
to steal you,
but u where not to be found,

once as a beggar,
to beg for you,
but u where not to be found,

even as i set the world ablaze in passion,
she did not yield,
mother earth kept you out of sight,

in despair i flung my masks to the fire,
and finally found you,
once i went as me .... <3

my mind on 300111

I'm a hermit crab,
in a sea of faceless shrimp,
drifting away in directionless wander,
but now i come to rest by ur glow,
with vague dreams and ur essence,
i build my castle of mist on alien sands,

we kept hope and love alive,
ur words like bellows,
breathing the breath if life,
on dying embers,
of by gone values and misty dreams,
gently lighting up my castle of mist.

in this stygian sea my castle glows,
illuminating my realm,
with hope and magic,
but when u leave,
it shall dissipate,
leaving behind a disillusioned hermit crab.

on this day - 260111

my yin and yang,

slips out of harmony,
spinning in the turbulent rage,
my soul unleashed on itself,
i feel my inside tear into a billion pieces,
and my face means nothing anymore,
i feel lost,
heading out to my destruction,
like a paper boat,
smashing against the rapids,
but just before,
u emerge,
the fires of rage and chaos,
illuminating your outline,
in bronze and gold,
you are Mars,

you are Venus,
you pull me out of my depths,
and restore balance,
like goddess Athena,
you fought my demons,
and restored harmony,

and i finally hear the songbird's tune.

....... :) <3

Weird updates 2579

New layout

‘The problem with your blog is that it is not appealing’ said my classmate and he is right. It is unappealing both visually and content wise. In an attempt to fix the latter I downloaded a template and i hope you guys like it.

A shout out to my buddy!
you guys can check out my classmate’s blog here - http://adnupgrade.blogspot.com/



broken, lonely, defeated and dead....

Today on the 25^th of July, my phone, a Nokia n70, has ceased to exist. After battling for her life in a Nokia ‘care’ centre.

Someone very dear to me no longer exists and every time i look at her blank screen and once lively keys I begin to realise the futility of life.
All the moments we shared together will always be edged in my mind but alas they will be the last.



Rest in Peace
you shall be truly missed....



my new class

just facts – no lies.

masters in communication, St Josephs

number of people: 30

number of acquaintances: 9

number of friends: 0

number of people i would like to be friends with: 10

number of people that i like (but haven’t gotten to know): 2

number of people that i love: 0

number of people i dislike: 3

number of people that dislike me: 22

number of people i hate: 0

number of people that hate me: 8




new posts that might come up -

1. my view on life
2. A poem i have been meaning to write